My negative emotions have brought me into dark places.
How could I ever attract to me good people, places or things with this darkness around me? I used to think bad luck followed me around but, I created this dark cloud surrounding me. It got so huge I created a storm in my life.
Little did I know it, the law of attraction was happening for me but in a bad way and a good way. It is also my teacher showing me what I need to fix to go to the level of what I want to attract.
I was so negative I created anxiety into my life. Everything were worries and the worries turned into fears. It affected my sleep, my daily moods, the way I respond to my family and anyone else around me. I would think awful things.
Law of attraction works whether you think good or bad. Any energy or thought you put out into the Universe will attract more of it.
I attracted a lesson to learn about myself. The Universe giving me all the bad in my life was hinting at me, “had enough?”
“it’s time to change”
Somethings I had to face of myself:
Self-Esteem- My own negativity started early in my life. It begins with my self-esteem. At a young age, I was always the weird one and the other kids in school would avoid me. I was also an overweight child. That didn’t help me either.
Locked emotions– At home, my parents expected me to just be a good child and be a good student. My parents were insensitive to my needs and feelings so, it was up to myself to care for my own emotions. All I did was keep it internally. They were unprocessed emotions that I kept internally like keeping trinkets in a box and never looking inside.
Self-image- As a teenager my self-esteem grew worse. I disliked my image. I started an eating disorder at a young age to “fit in” and never realized it until I was older.
Emotional spiral– I became rebellious with so much anger. I unleashed it to my parents. My teen years were solely anger and rage. These emotions carried into my adult life and kept spiraling downwards. Yet, I never fully understood it.
In college, a professor noticed my low moods and how it affected me coursework. He even lectured me in front of the class to embarrass me in order for me to listen. Clearly, I dropped it as soon as class was over. Actually, this was the first time I heard of Carl Jung’s, “What you resist, will persist”. The professor quoted it and told me to look into it.
Being aware of myself – I was never aware how I presented myself to people. My moods drew people away from me. People didn’t like my energy at all and I thought, it was just them not me. I am fine.
I realize now I neglected myself as a person because everyone else neglected me. I still am treated this way but, I’m grown. It’s time for me to care for myself.
In the positive way of thinking, I attracted a life lesson. Unfortunately for me it had to be a hard one because I didn’t fully see how much damage I was bringing to myself. All the people and situations I encountered were to show me how much I needed to change.
Change my thoughts. Change my perspective. Change the way I see myself before trying to get into a high vibration.
You can’t be negative and positive at the same time. It cancels each other out.
Of course there is changing with positivity. It’s not easy! My mind constantly goes back to the way I used to respond to situations and brings me back negative emotions. This drags me backwards and my progress doesn’t move forward. Therefore, consistent block in manifesting.
Even a month ago, I would think am I changing enough, how come I still can’t manifest?
I haven’t cleared enough resistance. My mentality goes back to the old. I do have a stubborn mind but, I will work on it again!
The Law Of Attraction is not just attracting good. It can attract the negative as well. It is always at work. You have to become the same level of what you want to attract. Stay consistent at a high vibrational level. For me I have a lot of ways to go but, I am climbing up there.
My goal is to keep clearing my old self and to begin again to a higher self!